If you know me or follow this blog at all, you'll have deduced I am a diehard single who hasn't been on an unadulterated date since 2011. However, tides changed recently, and over the course of seven days, I went on four dates with four different people.
How does that happen? Well, it's a mix of TV interviews, going big or going home, and Valentine's Day. Can you imagine my horror when my friends pointed out that last bit?
Me: UGH, AM I BASIC PERSON?!?! I need a vodka tonic.
In my defense, the TV interview happened because of V-Day, so there's some confounding there. In the news story, the reporter asked, "Have you been on a date?"
Me: "LOL no." (Actually, I said something to the effect of "I still want to believe in love without technology," and then dabbed my eye. FML.)
The first date.
I previously covered this in another post (which I wrote before I discovered I had three more dates coming). Long story short, it was a first date. I walked away (literally) and decided I had no feelings for her/this/romance.
I do think I walked by her and her dog later that week, but I didn't realize it until she had passed, so, like, oops? Sorry?
The second date.
When I first told people about this week of dating, I would cite three-and-a-half dates, which elicited, "What is a half date?"
Me: "When you ask someone to dinner without calling it a date, and it could just be friends, but you don't want it to be."
My friends: "That's a date."
They said it, not me.
Anyway, I met Woman #2 through a friend (love without technology for the win!!), Facebook messaged her a few times, then dropped my number and said we should get pho. I then defriended her so I would never have to face rejection. Just kidding. She said yes, and we got pho. The waitress never gave me the option to pay aka she brought over two tabs. So this was what made it a half-date. I also showed up five minutes late to reinforce the casual factor. You can't ever seem too eager.
The third date.
This started off super platonically (I thought). I've known Woman #3 for a while, but we happened to exchange numbers. Texting commenced. We said we'd go to a local park with her dog. Suddenly we were meeting on - wait for it - Valentine's Day. Come again? But I wasn't going to point it out.
But she did: "Ahhhh do we have a Valentine's date?!?!"
Me: "If we want to label it something."
Okay, I threw in some emojis so I wasn't totally aloof.
So we walked her dog, chatted, and said we'd get dinner later that week.
The fourth date.
After the first date, I contemplated giving up dating apps, but then I got matched with incredibly attractive Woman #4 who turned out to have a passion for writing and dancing. Conversation ran like a sprinkler in the summer: Refreshing, wanted, and unheeded. So I proposed coffee.
Bless technology, we continued chatting throughout the week without exchanging numbers. We even engaged in some non-sexual drunk texting the night before our date.
I thought the date went well, but I never heard back from her afterward. I warned my roommate, "I'm not waiting around; I'm not going to get attached."
My roommate: "No offense, but I was never worried that you would." What a compliment!
In hindsight, I probably shouldn't have disclosed on our date that if I attended Hogwarts, I would be a Slytherin. Total keeper right here. No wonder we never met up again.
All in all, the whole experience resulted in lots of self-reflection and sofa anguish over who am I. Am I a Bachelor contestant, or am I a content single? I also felt fraudulent going on back-to-back dates, though my friends assured me there's nothing dishonest about first dates (unless you're swapping STIs). I also don't know where I gained all this free time. Maybe I should join a civic league?
At least at the next family dinner when my aunt asks whether I've met anyone, I can say yes.