When I first started my original blog, Tweets and Mascara, I very narrowly focused on social media and selling makeup (hence the name). I didn't tell anyone I knew about the fact that I had a blog. I blogged just for the few strangers that stumbled upon my site from time to time. That type of blogging was easy.
But then I started to write about myself. Transitioning out of college and into a new full-time job in a different city is really challenging, and I thought if I could just voice the struggle of making ends meet, maybe someone would read it and feel less alone. Maybe I could help someone through the transition because they would know that there's really green pastures ahead.
Then I thought, maybe people I know would be interested about my life. If you know me in person, I'm sometimes not the open book of emotions I am on my blog. Maybe letting people read about my life would let people in without having to tell them about it directly. Maybe it'll be easier.
So I started promoting my blog on my Facebook page. And my family and friends were really receptive to it. I got a lot of praise for being so open and honest with myself and everyone who reads it. But it's actually a lot more challenging that I thought it would be. It's like peeling back my skin and exposing my guts to everyone. It forces me to process events in my life in a deeper way than I usually would prefer. I really like to keep my emotions close to my cuff, and in my blog, it is mandatory for me to look at what was bothering me, reflect on what I learned and how I can take it and move forward. That's really tough to do for someone who doesn't deal with emotions. And then to let it sit out on the inter-webs for my friends and family to read. Here's my heart, world. Be gentle?
So why blog about myself so candidly?
I should basically copy and paste that sentence back in here about forcing me to reflect on my life. And while sometimes I realize things that sort of suck about myself, more often than not, I reinforce the fact that I am really happy, that I just keep growing into a better and more successful person and it's great to be able to talk about how the bumps in the road got me here. And when people read something that you really put your heart into, it's speechlessly amazing to know that you can connect with someone on such a personal level and have an affect on them, despite often never actually knowing each other. It can take a big mushy and confusing terrain of a world and make it seem like we're all connected.
Blogging about myself has taught me more about myself than I thought it could. It's made me look at situations and consider: what do I believe? How do I react? What's the future hold? And while I don't always have the answer, the challenge is good for me. Being open and transparent is a constant battle, but one that has probably bettered myself both professionally and personally. Emotions aren't a bad thing: it's good to have feelings and let people see them. It's good to have stories and share them. Talking about life makes living it easier. Blogging is a way for me to process what is happening, and articulate to myself how I should have handled it, what I could do next time, how this relates to that, and how I feel about it.
Blogging is personal. It's scary. It's weird. People know me without knowing me. But blogging lets me know me more personally, too.
Thank you for being an active member of this adventure with me. It's nice to have you along for the ride.