I hope we all remember where I stand on Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift is a brat. Since the time I chronicled her pulling every song she has ever sang off of Spotify like a damn child, she's pulled quite a few new, equally brattier stunts that deserve to be collected into one place. So join me on the adventure of: Taylor Swift is still a brat.
Back in January, Taylor Swift decided to trademark some of her lyrics.
Her trademark request included the following lyrics:
- "Party Like It's 1989" Taylor, do you really think you're being that highly original on this one? Because I don't. This saying (maybe insert a different year) has been around longer than you. Sit down.
- "This Sick Beat" Again, YOU'RE NOT THAT CREATIVE HERE. But beyond that, the irony kills me because it's not like this song even has a sick beat. Maybe let Dillon Francis remix it and then that statement would be less ironic.
- "Cause We Never Go Out of Style" Alright, you're getting a little more novel with this one, but I'm still not impressed.
- "Could Show You Incredible Things" Okay, Taylor, you roughly ripped off the Little Mermaid and then trademarked it. Clever.
- "Nice to Meet You, Where You Been?" OH PLEASE. You're not the first person to phrase meeting someone new and wondering how it took that long to find them. You're killing me, dude.
I LOVE how Taylor Swift thinks she's this original, magnificent lyricist who deserves to trademark all these things, when in reality, she borrowed quite a bit for her album.
- "Bad Blood," has been done by Bastille. Same title. Same message of the song. Similar lyrics.
- "Shake It Off," stole the similar style of sassy girl talk-rap from Avril Lavigne, who did that same technique YEARS AGO.
- "Wildest Dreams," sounds like she channeled every ounce of Lana Del Ray she could possible muster. Just with less mystique and class.
If you're going to throw a hissy-fit about your artistry, at least be unique.
More recently, Taylor Swift attacked higher education prep.
In true brat fashion, Taylor Swift tweeted, "Not the right lyrics at all pssshhhh. You had one job, test people. One job," after she caught wind that an SAT prep book got her lyrics wrong. So a month ago, you trademarked dumb lyrics so no one could use them directly, AND NOW you're pissed when people don't use the right lyrics. Have you ever thought, Taylor, that maybe they were scared of your crazy betch ass coming after them if they quoted them directly? OR maybe -- just maybe -- your shitty lyrics are not the priority for higher education? You're not everyone's/anyone's center of the universe.
TaylorSwift.Porn is taken.
Bye Felicia. I'm a little upset that Taylor was on the ball (I mean, it's not surprising that she is) and got her XXX website URL's. I would have LOVED to see how she would have handled someone else getting TaylorSwift.porn. It would have been hilarious to me, so I'm sad it won't be happening.
And if this is true, I hate her.
Apparently, Taylor Swift said that there is a special place in hell for Amy Poehler and Tina Fey because they don't help other women. You are kidding me, right Taylor? If there are any women who are vocal feminists in Hollywood, and set a clear example of what a strong working women can achieve, it is these two women. Take a joke Taylor, and don't you dare talk shit about women would could run circles around you.
Taylor Swift is a brat. 2015 is turning out to just reinforce that fact.