Stop the Thought Crimes: Use Words, Not Emojis

**Originally posted on WriteHere**

George Orwell’s novel 1984 is becoming a reality, but it's not the government deeming self-expression a thought crime. We’re doing it to ourselves. For those of you who haven’t read 1984 (or for those who were supposed to read it in high school and never did), the basic premise of the book is that the government is working to control people’s thoughts through Newspeak, where they eliminate words so that people cannot rebel.

When the government takes away words, it lessens people’s ability to object to their totalitarian ways, and hinders people from being able to give a deeper context to their thoughts. Without words, people lose their ability to think on their own accord because they can't articulate anything other than what the government wishes. It’s mind control.

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Touch Me

Yesterday my friend told me she wanted a salad, so later I asked if she got her salad. Yeah, she went to Panera, and she got some Asian salad.

Me: “McDonald’s has the same salad for half price. It’s so good.”

(I actually don’t know if McDonald’s has the same salad, but they have darn good salads, and I’m a staunch McD’s advocate, because ice cream cones. And iced coffee. ~swoons~)

“But,” my friend says, insert blah blah bah. Probably something about Panera bread on the side. Whoopdie do dah.

Me: “Touch you.”

My friend frowns. “What did you say?”


“Did you say touch me?”

Yeah, I did. “Yeah, touch you.”

“What does that mean?”

“Like, touch you.”

Long pause.

“It’s a figure of speech,” I attempt to justify while remembering that this is the third time I’ve had this conversation in recent memory. Every time I say “touch you” and there’s break enough in the conversation for my friend to question it, I end up defending the saying.

Because it is a saying. Right?

Apparently not because no one else knows it. But I use it all the time, and I have no idea where it came from. I hate to think I made it up.

“It’s, like, referencing King Midas,” I elaborate to my friend. “Like, touch you, I might turn to gold. You know the guy, whatever he touched, it turned to gold?”

“Yeah, I know the story.”

“It’s like ‘Do you want a cookie?’ You just say, ‘Touch me.’”

My friend shakes her head. Amused, but not amused.

Me: “Is that not a saying?” I then ponder, “It sounds sorta sexual, doesn’t it? That’s awkward. I don’t mean it in a sexual way. Is it really not a saying?”

“No…it isn’t.”

So have I made up a new catchphrase?

Editor's Note: I vote no, that is not a real saying.